Cuddler

By cuddler he means curls into fetal position and cries often.

Depressed and Isolated says: “After over five months of trying to help her, my girlfriend left me recently and started doing Crystal Meth and cocaine. I only have one friend, and my best friend killed herself three years ago. I’ve been isolated so much that I can’t act normally around other people.”

And we thought Mr. Killjoy was bad at breaking the ice. The point of a personal ad is often missed. Your ad is supposed to¬†ATTRACT people. That’s the goal.

Depressed and Isolated also says: I’ve never had a respectable girlfriend, but I have a 3.75 GPA, an IQ of over 125, and eligibility to Brown University.”

You have bad judgement, no friends, and cannot act normal. Nothing here is appealing.¬†Perhaps we’ve identified your problem or who knows it could be that horrendous unibrow you’ve got goin on. Why don’t you fix that up a bit and go from there?

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