Needs to Learn How to Spell says: “WHY IS IT SO HARD TO FIND A LADY IN PORTLAND THATS CURVY AND KNOWS WHAT A PARE OF OPEN TOE SHOES (We’re not sure we know what a “pare” is either) ARE SOMEONE THATS NOT A HIPPY WANT_A _BEE I SWERE I NEED TO MOVE TO MIAMI !!!!!!! (Don’t threaten the poor women of Portland like that, you’re crushing dreams, breaking hearts, and shattering hope or something like that…)”
For one, you’re in Portland. You don’t go to Old Navy and expect to find a Big Mac. Also, it’s cold and raining there 10 months out of the year. Thinking open toe shoes aren’t the choice footwear for a reason.